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"As an old hard-core biker I never thought I would
be doing this kind of work. Gordon is a man of power and
integrity. He knows how to meet us men. He helped me break
my hard shell." Male
"I loved your energy, compassion, courage to take us all the way, ingenuity, creativity, organization, variety of activities." Woman Therapist
"Gordon is a wonderfully sensitive, grounded, fierce and
tender man. The workshop is truly unique in its breath and
depth of reaching into men's souls." Male
Professional
"You are truly a master of "dadship" and the space of safety and support you created was soooooo reassuring." Saleswoman
"Excellent presence and great masculine modeling. It was
great. At times difficult, cathartic, insightful, annoying,
inspiring." Man
"Gordon creates a space for women to go as deeply as they choose to heal their father wounds." Professional Woman
"Knowledgeable, committed, effective, solid, grounded.
Did a great job of holding the space while still being
vulnerable, human and accessible." Self-employed Man
"Gordon is the cleanest, clearest male energy I personally have experienced in my life." Self-employed Woman
"Gordon, you're a real man, truly a player, in the best
sense of the word, not posturing, not pontificating, very
fluid, very focused, very real, human, accessible. You were
a leader/mentor and yet one of us. You honored us."
Professional Man
"Your role was like the curator of the art gallery of the human soul. Really." Woman Therapist
Gordon Clay
An advertising executive1965-2001, Gordon began grassroots men's work around single fathering issues in 1976. In 1979, he established The Fathers' Network as a referral for fathers who want to work with the issues, problems and joys of parenting. In 1982, he created The National Men's Resource Center, a reference of men's organizations, research, books, publications, cultural programs and films on men's issues with the goal to end men's isolation. In 1983, he was a co-planner of the 2nd Women & Men Together gathering in Santa Cruz, CA. In 1984, he developed Tantrum Yoga® movement and breath work system devoid of any violence such as pillow pounding. He founded Heartworks to offer mind & body consulting based on this concept. In 1985, he published the first quarterly issue of Menstuff®, The National Men's Resource and continued as publisher until it became a website in August, 1996 (www.menstuff.org). In December, 2004, the website received over 2,500,000 hits for the first time and received over 100,000 hits on December 21 and 29. Also, back in 1985, he created a workshop for women only and men only titled Healing the Father Wound® (now called Clearing the Air - Father) and in 1986 created the first Rites-of-Passage for Fathers & Teenage Daughters with his daughter, Natalie.
He has also presented numerous workshops on anger, single parenting, fathers and daughters, etc. He was co-chair of the National Organization for Men Against Sexism 1987-1989 and board president of the California Men's Gathering Inc., 1993-94 as well as a co-planner of the 8th, 15th and 25th gatherings. In 1991, he created Everyman, which helps men bring other men in their community together for a day of information and process with the goal of building or strengthening the local men's community. In 1994, he appeared in a powerful video on diversity, The Color of Fear, which won the National Education Media Gold Apple Award (and the remake Walking Each Other Home) . That year, he also created the Browser's Bookmobile, a mobile library of over 1,000 books on men's issues and was a full-time RVer until December 31, 1999, traveling over 30,000 miles through 26 states and visiting rural communities too small to support their own bookstore or library. He has presented numerous times at not only the National Organization for Men Against Sexism but also The National Congress of Men. He has been the male panelist in "GenderSpeak" a communications program produced by Harper's Bazaar, presented for three years at the Chico State University's "Men in the 90's" weeks, at Senator Maddy's Annual Women's Conference in Fresno, CA, the International Men's Conference, and was a co-presenter with John James on several conferences on Men in Recovery.
Television and radio appearances include Oprah, Real Personal on CNBC and Hour Magazine, and he has appeared on numerous radio and live Internet news programs and in magazine and newspaper articles. In 1994, he became a Founding Board Member of The National Men's Resource Center where he continues to hold the position of Executive Director and curator/driver of the Browsers' Bookmobile. Contact us here (See complete vitae. Trainings as a participant.)
- 2008-2006: Created Men's Mini Health Fair in local communitees.
- 2008-2006: Through My Eyes Essay Contest - with local high school students on the impact of drugs and alcohol on their lives. Local newspaper prints winning essays weekly and published a booklet of all of the essays.
- 2008-2006 - Created a web site www.WomenInRacing.org to encourage fathers to support their daughters in male dominant sports and daugthers to do what THEY want to do. We list over 1,400 women racers on the site plus a lot of information and resources on how to get your daughter started.
- 2008-2001 - Created the Wildwood Himitage (vs. Hermitage), outside Brookings, OR (www.wildwoodhimitage.com)
- 2008-2001 - Built The Men's Study which houses 256 linear feet of books broken down by 100 men's issues.
- 2008-1994: Developed a web site on men's issues called www.menstuff.org, which has grown to become the largest web site on men's issues and gets over 100,000 hits a day. Connected to it are specific issue web sites: www.fatherstuff.org, www.healthstuff.us, www.mensissues.us, www.relationstuff.org, and www.letstalkaboutsex.org as well as www.fatherwound.com, and soon to be activated www.teensstuff.org.
- 2008-1991 - Everyman - Helps men bring other men in their community together for a day of information and process with the goal of building or strengthening the local men's community.
- 2008 -1985 - Created Menstuff® to end men's isolation. Converted to a website (www.menstuff.org) in 1996, it lists thousands of on-site men's book reviews & covers, men's resources and hyperlinks and hundreds of men's events, periodicals and groups committed to a positive change in male roles and relationships
- 2008 -1984 - Developed advances: Healing the Father Wound® for Women Only and Men Only, Father & Teen-age Daughter Rite-Of-Passage, The Male Experience for Fathers & Teen-age Sons, Women & Men: Being Our True Selves Together, Clearing the Air™ Between Women and Men, Men Dealing with Our Anger, and Healing the Mother Wound® for Women Only and Men Only
- 2008 -1982 - Created The National Men's Resource Center, a not-for-profit educational resource (68.0337499) of men's organizations, events, research, books, publications, culture programs, films and more to end men's isolation. He serves as Executive Director and Curator/Driver of the Browser's Bookmobile and manages several web sites including www.pcaw.org (prostate cancer awareness week), www.tcaw.org (testicular cancer awareness week), www.mencare.org, www.menatrisk.org, and most recently www.WomenInRacing.org
- 2008 -1979 - Established The Fathers' Network as a referral for fathers who want to work with the issues, problems and joys of parenting
- 1999-1994 - Created Browser's Bookmobile, a mobile library of 1,000 books on 60 men's issues that traveled to rural communities too small to support their own library or bookstore. He drove the Bookmobile full-time over 30,000 miles through 24 states. The Bookmobile was retired from active travel on 12.31.99 and is currently being used as an Annex to The Men's Study.
- 1994 - Was a cast member in the films The Color of Fear (1994) and the remake Walking Each Other Home (1997).
- 2005, 1994-81 - California Men's Gathering Inc., Board member 1994-93, President 1993, Co-planner of the 8th, 15th and 25th
- 1990 - Created and produced the "Clear Energy" ritual audio tape with the late Frank "Suru" Ekeh & Jim Berenholtz and "Issues", a unique intuition tape
- 1989-84 - Member National Organization for Men Against Sexism. Council member 1986-88. Council Co-Chair 1987-1989
- 1988-84 - "What Do Men Really Want" conference. Associate speaker 1985
- 1988 - Developed "Strengthening the Bonds", a process to build pride and self-esteem vs. hazing in fraternity pledge programs
- 1986 - Created Wacky Window Wobbles to politicize automobile windows
- 1985-81 - California Anti-Sexist Men's Political (CAMP) Caucus. Co-Editor-Making Waves, and Direct Action Task Groups
- 1984 - Developed Tantrum Yoga®, a movement and breath work system for the safe and healthy expression of anger and rage in a non-hitting, non-violent way
- 1983 - Co-planner - 2nd "Women & Men Together" gathering in Santa Cruz, CA
- 1982 - Co-creator of the Road Show, a program designed to present issue-oriented workshops in local communities
- 1981 - Started presenting workshops on: single parenting, anger, homophobia, relationships, starting a men's group, men & friendship, men & war, myths about women-myths about men, expectations, intimacy, big boys don't cry, etc.
- 1976 - Began grassroots men's work around single fathering issues
SPEAKER 2008-1981: North Coast Educational Summit 2/03, 04, 05; Mankind Project '99 conference in Indianapolis, 2005 conference in Milwaukee; Senator Maddy's 5th Fresno (CA) Women's Conf; State of California's 14th Conf on Self-Esteem; Harper's Bazaar "GenderSpeak" panel at Today's Woman conf, Nordstrom & Neiman Marcus; "Men in the 90's" Chico State University 3x; Men in Recovery with John James 2x; Inter Men's Conf in Austin, TX 2x; Keynote at 1st Men's Symposium, Walnut Creek, CA; "What Do Men Really Want" conf; Mid-Coast Psychological Assoc & Family Services of Santa Cruz and numerous presentations at National Conferences on Men & Masculinity, the California Men's Gatherings and the North Coast Men's Gatherings.
MEDIA APPEARANCES 2008-1982: TELEVISION:
Oprah Winfrey, Real Personal-CNBC-TV, Hour Magazine, Rick at
Night-San Luis Obispo, People Are Talking-KPIX-TV, AM San
Francisco and AM Weekend-KGO-TV, Express-KQED-TV, Studio
A-KTVU-TV, Do It, SacraMENshow, Metavisions-Viacom Cable.
RADIO: Ashland Public Radio; Appearances/guest host
of Man-to-Man talk show-KCBS, Let's Talk About It-KSOL, Open
Mind-KNBR, Potpourri-KBLX, In A Man's Shoes-Boston, Building
Bridges, Lunch Box & Changing Men-KPFA Berkeley &
KFCF Fresno. MAGAZINES: Brother, Changes, Focus, Man,
Marin Family News, Men's Health, New Republic, New Woman,
Quest, San Francisco Image. NEWSPAPERS: Baltimore
Sun, Christian Science Monitor, Los Angeles Times, Marin
Independent Journal, Oakland Tribune, Pacific Sun, San
Francisco Chronicle, Sober Times, USA Today, Wingspan.
BOOKS: Selection in The Best Man MOVIES: "The
Color of Fear" and the sequel "Walking Each Other Home".
The year 2000 had much significance for me as it was a year of milestones. I turned 60 in March, the year of the dragon and I was born in the year of the dragon. I had been doing men's work for 25 years, had been doing Healing the Father Wound® workshops for 15 years (45 weekends for women only, 27 for men only, and 8 years of women and men via Clearing the Air), and spent 5½ years on the road in the Browsers' Bookmobile, the last 4 ½ of those years being full-time on the road.
I had done much personal work, over the years, and had learned much from others. As some of you know, I was doing what I had asked you to do. Take the year 2000 to eliminate the things I don't like about myself, to replace them with new patterns, belief systems, and ways of being that really suit who I am at my core, so that I can start the new millennium, which really beings 01.01.01, as that person.
My way of doing this was to do up to a one-year advance, not retreat, free from outside influences, and see what really works for me. This meant no workshops, no income producing work, no traveling, no television, radio, newspapers, or magazines, no direct human contact of any kind for up to a year, and maybe more. (Progress Report.) My intention was to return to facilitating the workshops in June of 2001, which I did. Gordon Clay
1981 Fathering: It Ain't What it Used to Be; Reevaluation Counciling - Blumenthal*; 4th California Men's Gathering
1982 6th Conference on Men & Masculinity; Women & Men Togeether - Santa Cruz;11/19-21/82 Real Men, Real Women - Quiche 2.
1983 California Anti-Sexist Men's Political (CAMP) Caucus; 5/3/83 Petaluma Mens Night Out; 6/11-12/83 Quiche Raft Trip (24); 11/26/83 Extended Family - Asara; How to Deal with an Angry Woman - George Simon; Women & Men Together - Santa Cruz
1984 3/2-4/84 Who Are You, Oriental Massage training - Graduate 12.39.84; Spring, 1984 Magic of the Elements; 5/11-13/84 Sex, Love & Intimacy Level I; 7/24-29/84 Love & Intimacy Level 3; 9/14-16/84 Love & Intimacy Level 2; 10/12-14/84 Love & Intimacy Level 4; 10/84 Who Are You;
1985 Continued massage training; 2/2-3/85 Open Life; 6/85 Mendocino Men's Gathering; 8/9-11/85 Love & Intimacy Level 4;
1986:1/26/86 2nd Level Massage graduation; Gay Luce's year-long Nine Gates Mystery School; 1986 Men of Marin;1/18 or 5/10/86 Re-Sourcing - Carolyn Anderson/Jeff Daly; 5/86 Mendocino Bly; 5/30-6/1/86 Love & Intimacy Level 4; 6/6-8/86 Man & His Spirit - Bliss; November, Palenque. Dr Z;
1987 Shamanic or sooner - Harner - CIIS, Esalen, Boston, Solo-NYC; 2/6-8/87 Dance of the Deer - Brant Secunda; 12/87 Domain Shift;
1988: 2/19-21/88 Warriors of the Heart; 4/22-24/88 Masquemaking as Medicine Way-Suki Jay/Tom Pinkson; 12/2-4/88 Sex, Love & Intimacy Level 5;
1989
1990: 6/22-24/90 - New Warriors - Chicago; 9/ - Spiritual Warrior; John Gray; Next Step Women & Men- Durango; Shaman`s Circle - Austin; Mendocino Bly Leader`s Conference;
1991
1992: 1/12/92 - Bali; New Warrior Integration Group through 8/94
1993: 2/21 - Ovarios y Cojones - Clarissa Pinkola Estes & Michael Meade; 4/93 - David Crump's Essential Experience; 6/93 - Reunion - Shaman`s Circle - Mendocino; PSI World (93/94?); 12/18/93 - Canada and Cancun Mexico;
1994: Heart of Courage - model mugging; Mendocino Gathering for Women & Men; 8/20/94 - Back to US - from Canada; 9/94 - 1st Gender Reconciliation Conference, Arlington, VA; New Warrior Integration Group
1995: Tantric Training - Maryse Cote; 1/7/95 - My Family, Myself, San Francisco, CA; 1/20-22/95 - The Mind of Love - Christina & Michael Naumer, Novato, CA; 1/28-29/95 - The Mythos: W&M, Michael Meade, Headlands, CA; 3/12/95 - Asemblage Point Shift, Alive Tribe - Calistoga, CA; 4/30-5/1/95 - Healing Intimate Trauma, Harbin, Middletown, CA; 8/27-9/1/95 - Village of Reconciliation, Michael Meade/Edie Turner, Mendocino, CA; 10/13/95 - Canada;
1996: 7/96 - Men & Masculinity Conference, Lewis & Clark College, Portland; MiVoden, Hadden Lake, ID - Phyllis's Training with John Shiere; 11/8/96 - Equador & Peru;
1997: Healing the Mother Wound, Lourdes Billingsley; 2/97; Head Start, Sacramento; 9/27-10/10/97 - Greece & NYC;
1998: Life Mastery, Louis Stoltz, Escondido; W&M, Charlie Kriener, Pacific Grove (or 1999?); 12/98 - Amanae 5-day training; Burning Man
1999: 4/8-11 & 15-18/99 - Motherwave Lv 1; Tantric Meditation with Baba Ji at Mount Modanna; 4/22-25/99 - Healing the Mother Wound, Shauna Wilson; 5/27-30/99 - Motherwave Lv 2; 7/8-11/99 - 24th Men & Masculinity Conference, Pasadena; 7/16-22/99 - Motherwave Lv 3; 7/23-25/99 - Present "Walking Each Other Home", New Warrior/Woman Within, Indianapolis, IN; Dan Millman-Mt Madonna, CA; Warrior Monk, Glen Ivy, CA: Father Wound workshop, the Hermit card was left behind by the previous group. DJ at Burning Man
2000: Gordon took a sabbatical (an advance) for the year 2000 to prepare for the new millennium. Everything seemed to point in another direction than the one I was going in. What was strange was there were no sign post telling me where I was going or what or who I was to become and what or who I was becoming. Concluded in September to staffed first Inside Circle in Folsom Prison
2001: Healing the Mother Wound, Shauna Wilson; Staffed second Inside Circle - Folsom Prison. DJ at Burning Man
2002: 2/16-17 - Woman's Love, Man's Freedom: Two Sexual Paths, One Spiritual Bliss - David Dieda's program, Ashland, OR; 3/1-3/02 - The Celebration of the Noble Man, Staffed The Power of Love; Vision Quest, Alburquerce, NM; Conscious Connection, Marin.11/7/02 - Informed that I have a Health Opportunity - I had been diagnosed with prostate cancer; DJ at Burning Man
2003: 1/12-2/2/03 - Optimum Health Institute, Lemon Grove, CA; 2/7-9/03 - Presented "Walking Each Other Home" at the North Coast Educational Conference, Arcadia, CA and at the North Coast Men's Gathering May 30-June 1, 2003. Thailand. DJ at Burning Man
2004: January - Optimum Health Institute, Lemon Grove, CA; Conscious Connection - Seattle; I Wish I Knew Now What I Knew Then - North Coast Men's Gathering; Somatic Training - Seattle; North Coast Ritual Village with Shauna Wilson. DJ at Burning Man in Deep Heaven
2005: 2/1-28 - Thailand, Laos, Cambodia ; 3/1-20/05 - Optimum Health Institute, Lemon Grove, CA; DJ at Burning Man in Deep Heaven; HAI Couples Workshop; AMP; HAI Level 1, Intensive with Oscar Miro-Quesada, California Men's Gathering, North Coast Men's Gathering, Nevada City Men's Gathering
2006: John Hunter; DJ at Burning Man in Deep Heaven; Nevada City Men's Gathering
2007:
New Warrior Staffings:
Portland, OR: 3/94, 6/94
San Diego, CA: 2/92, 4/92, 5/92, 11/92*, 2/93, 11/93, 2/94*, 3/94
San Francisco, CA: 4/98*, 11/06
Tucson, AZ: 4/94
Inside Circle - Folsom Prison, CA - 1st and 2nd multi-day trainings, 2000/01
* Approximate date I believe I took the
workshop/training
Additional workshops Taken
Sex, Love & Intimacy - 6 Levels plus Couples
Tom Pinkson - W&M at Harbin
Men's Retreat at Monterey - in the condo and the Santa Cruz theatre Fred Jealous?
Women & Men Together - Santa Cruz - two years
Charlie Kriener: Camp Swig; W&M with Shauna Wilson Mora
Stan and Christina Grof - Holotropic Breath Work
Steven Kessler
Gabrielle Roth - Westerbeke Ranch
Justine Sterling - Men, Sex and Power - Oakland
John Gray - Men are from Mars, Women are from Venius
Gay Hendricks
Sam Osherson on Fathering - Esalen
Fathers & Daughters - Larry Lima, Esalen
Daniel Ellenberg - San Francisco intimacy plus Men's weekend at Harbin
Shadow Work - Harbin, Troy Rampy
Mother Shadow - Joya Jennings
Healing the Mother Wound - Carolyn Baker, Lourdes Billingsley, Shauna Wilson Mora twice
Michael Meade for Women & Men on his own - Headlands
Michael Meade/Angeles Arian - Mills College
Michael Meade/Clarisa Pincola Estes - Palance of Fine Arts
John/Mary - Women & Men - Esalen
Janet Hurley - Inner Abused Child work, in Aptos, Carmel Valley
Various Domain Shift workshops: Domain Shift, Life Stages, Life Stages & Addictions, Bring Your Body Along, Unraveling
Sweat Lodges with Wallace Black Elk, Charlie Tom, Eagle Man, Lorendra.
Vision Quest with Phillis Clay
Corporate Work:
Kansas City Star Chicago Office (65-66), Leo Burnett, Chicago (66-72), Bryan/Donald Advertising, Kansas City, MO (72-76); N. W. Ayer/Pritikin & Gibbons San Francisco, (76-81); Foote, Cone & Belding-Impact San Francisco (82-83), Straw Hat/Saga Foods Dublin, CA (84/85); Tracy Locke, San Francisco. (85/86). Started MAS Medium 1/1/87. Clients included Diet Centers, Del Monte Foods, and the California Milk Advisory Board through 2001.
A Gordonism: I am happy to be just where I am.
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